As a woman I know very little of the struggles and pressures men face. I have no idea what it’s like to transition from boy to man. All I know is the unanswered cry from this woman to men. I’ve laughed along countless times about a father not being ready for his little girl to grow up. The shot gun he’ll keep to protect her. All the boys he’ll run off. But I’ve never understood how a man could not want his little girl to experience love. I don’t see how men have missed their connection in the perceptions women have of them.
How is it that men can want their mothers, daughters, sisters, cousins, nieces, friends etc. to stay clear of men, encourage them that they deserve much better than their options, when you as a man desire the love from a woman? Could it be that you do not want to be found out as inadequate? Could it be that you know your darkest of hearts while she looks at you as the picture of perfection she’ll never find? Can you not imagine her being beaten, raped, lied to, betrayed, heartbroken, diseased, manipulated, and degraded in the ways in which you have done so many innocent just like her? Is she somehow better than the others, not deserving of what they deserved? Tell me how you can see yourself as a good man and not think that she can find someone for the example you have shown? Or is it that you have not been that example? Is it that you do not know a good man, including yourself? Is it that you have been preaching one thing and doing other things in the shadows you didn’t know had light?
If only men could take the first steps to be the type of man they want to be, instead of making excuses for what they do and how they treat women. Maybe if men would take the time to understand rape culture, they would know harmless isn’t so harmless. Then maybe, just maybe, you would see in yourself the warnings you give to your daughters, sisters, mothers, nieces, cousins, friends, etc.
From a woman to men,
I will always love with a real and gentle love. I will always be there to support you. I will always be there with the softness and strength only a woman can provide. I will always come running to your arms of protection. I will release my tears so that they may provide the water to soften the soil of your heart. May you become great men, may you produce even greater men. May you become the love you expect. The pain has been real but my faith in you is so even more.